LOGAN LUCKY (2017) movie review

Logan Lucky flew the checkered flag before the film could turn a jumble of post-punch anticipated laugh lines into workable plot points.Soderbergh directed Oceans 11 in 2001, offering the world the perfect ensemble cast in a lively, paced, heist film with memorable hooks and twists. Another great cast joined him for his newest edition, which hoped to be another Oceans-esque playful, comedic, strategic romp, this time claiming the take from a day at the races instead of taking the house at a Casino.Channing Tatum plays good dad straight man with a plan, but he’s no Danny Ocean. Stakes were too low to pull buy in. Sadly, sunshine on the speedway, Seth MacFarlane’s fake accent, and a cutesy singing pageant girl could not fix the thing that was off as I watched and waited for the pace to pick up, the jokes to land, and for anything other than the surprise of Daniel Craig’s physical comedy to work.Admittedly, Driver’s prosthetic arm stole scenes, but the punchy potential one-liners waited for forced laughter, as most cast members delivered quirk without character development.

HAIL, CAESAR! (2016) movie review

Hail-Caesar-2016-2Hail, Caesar! is a delight. Set in the fifties at the height of musical movie madness, it was a time when Gene Kelly and favorite dance partner Fred Astaire tapped and swooned to golden tunes, when every woman wanted sharp-witted Clark Gable or leather-tanned Cary Grant to sweep them up, when the ladies of the hour were few but interchangeable unless they could stand out as dancers or swimmers. The silver screen was a small world full of dazzling stars with clean slates.hail-caesar-tv-spot-3Here in Hail, an ensemble of A+ stars play one-dimensional dolts and hardline honeys clamping Clooney in with communists, sharing Fiennes’s finesse as a classic actor, making Tatum tap on tables, and showing Scarlett Jo flap her fins. It’s elegantly laced with narration following the work day of Josh Brolin, one heartfelt Hollywood Studio manager bent on doing what is right.Hail__Caesar__Offi_1055160aThree layers pervade the dialogue throughout the film: the existing value, despite obvious divisions, within religious beliefs, political biases, and movie making.hail-caesar-680x400We follow the film producer who questions the merits of the industry and his work in it. Walking the ridgepole of his decision, he scoops in as handyman at the helm holding all things at the studio in harmony, fending off poparazzi wolves, endearingly all played by Tilda Swinton. hail caesar review mainWe attend a premiere with a fresh faced all-western cowhand. He croons sincerely while the audience roars over slapstick sloshings. Division. Value?Hail-Caesar-2016-17Clooney’s character is held hostage by men claiming to be communist writers who feel they must buck the system and capsize the studio called the Capitol.thumbnail_23310The film Hail, Caesar! is the film within the film showing a Roman guard gaining perspective for life and truth at the feet of the crucified Christ. An honest dialogue between four faiths ensues, speaking the blatant confusing disparities without preaching tolerance and without honoring one above another. The audience sits in, laughs, enjoys.img5So, religion & politics, long-time taboo topics, are fair game for the Coens who even take stabs at their own art: filmmaking. Could it be that the Coen brothers, perhaps better known for writing and directing darker films like Fargo and No Country for Old Men, have made a picture for the picture’s sake? For fun? Poking fun at film has rarely been this delightful. Shakespeare did the same thing, sneering at all people groups, allowing for pure comedy to shine through, for people to laugh at each other, at themselves, at life. 5184Hail the conquering Coens as they cart us along by chariot in this perfectly lovely philosophical journey dipped in sweet, aesthetic, syrupy comedy.

Would that it were so simple.hail-caesar-alden-ehrenrich-ralph-fiennes-1

JUPITER ASCENDING (2015) movie review

jupiter_ascending_pushed_2015_lWhat’s in a name?
Everything, apparently.
Channing Tatum lures an audience of lonely women, Step Up dance fans, and heart throb honeys looking to him to fill their Saturdays with shirts-off eye candy. In that case, Jupiter excels.
Mila Kunis‘s name promises dark eyeshadow dreams and daylight sighs. Her teen impressions are spot-on every time.rs_560x415-140327073050-1024.Jupiter-Ascending-Mila-Kunis-JR1-32714_copy
Sean Bean, ever Boromir, brings the sci-fi fans a quick thrill with his original accent and scenes of hard punching. Though he tries for the likable space-rogue status, he can never quite reach his inner Han Solo. Not enough comedy…even his smiles look angry.

And sweet Eddie Redmayne‘s big bang into stardom began with his role in Les Miserables and evolved into larger roles. He is currently up for an Oscar for his portrayal of Stephen Hawking in The Theory of Everything. In Jupiter, however, he whispers his way to the purest dark side as this film’s Hitler, trading bones for soap stones in effect by managing the factory that turns humans into liquid life. A sort of advanced anti-age serum.jupiter-610x350

And finally the big names: The Wachowski‘s, of the Matrix fame. Ironically, they wrote and directed this film in which yet another advanced life-form chooses to liquefy people into a product worth killing for. Decent plot repeat on the sci-fi syndicate.
I left feeling adequately sci-fi satisfied with endless kicking and sky-skating. My dad loved it. Aliens. Kicking. Explosions. Yes. Yes. Yes. He had to agree, however, that the dialogue was junior high driven, if not written, and when the plot lacked, shooting commenced.
You obviously won’t go for an intellectual boost. You won’t have to think at all, in fact. It feels very Men in Black minus the quirky duo and catch phrases.
“Say it again.”
“Your highness.”
“Yeah. I like that.”

Wow.

Oddly, the costumes and creature creations were almost worth the ticket. I enjoyed the sequence of alien waiting lines and red-tape best, even though it led to another poorly executed scene in which lycan bodyguards wrestled dragon dino slaves to free the helpless virginal beekeeping princess from a fate worse than death. Good thing they brought their flying boots along.jupiter-ascending-boots-01

BRICK MANSIONS (2014) movie review


640_Brick_Mansions_RelativiEach year around my birthday, a new Fast & Furious franchise film hits big screens to my deep joy. In no other films do lack of plot and surf culture dialogue marry special effects lighting on, in, and around fast cars…until now. Paul Walker’s last film, dedicated to his memory, is a screen gem to keep on the shelf next to his F&F series.

As an intentional movie viewer,  it’s refreshing at times to take off the hat of a serious critic and replace it with the cap of zero expectation.

Brick-Mansions-David-Belle1Brick Mansions features a parkour expert for the whole first hour, thrilling audiences with hurdles over unlocked doors. Doorknobs are for sissies who can’t handle the inner city life. His  indistinguishable French accent ceases to be a problem as soon as he teams up with Paul Walker, who refuses to explain that he’s an undercover cop working with not against the man they all call “Frenchie.” They fight it out like so many battling brothers only to treat the streets like Channing Tatum would, with choreographed Step Up-esque moves, heavy brick throwing, and jumping action. The team has to rescue the girl who wears her school-girl uniform to her waitress job. Turns out she has moves too, and can take out the brute squad cat fem fatale in mini leather shorts and uncomfortable looking bustier.
brick-mansions-image02 Brick-Mansions-Movie-Review-Image-2 brick-mansions-4The girl fight is far too weapon-enhanced and gruesome, but somehow they walk away unscathed. Herein lies the beauty of these game-to-life films: 9 lives, stolen rockets, briefcase bomb threats, and dirty politicians. But don’t worry, the ultimate bad guy drug lord eats his veggies and will run for Mayor in the end.brick-mansions-image06

Two words that this wonder film lacked: Vin Diesel. Guess we’ll have to wait for FF7.

Thank you, Paul Walker. These words are not enough for the yearly joy you brought into my life and to so many others. You, your work, and your philanthropy will not be forgotten.paul-walker_0

THE VOW (2012) movie review

Only an original or neatnik knock-off Nicholas Sparks could tempt us into the theaters wooing us like a candyman into the heart of chick flick central. Does it end well? No. Is it well acted? Not really. Does Channing Tatum take his shirt off? Yes. Yes he does.

So we drive shamelessly to theaters to tempt and tantalize and torment ourselves with lies that one completely selfless, artistic, immutable, soft-spoken, generous, heterosexual, charming, chivalrous, chiseled, constant, all-loving, perfect man exists for each of us off-screen.