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LAST CHRISTMAS (2019) movie review in haiku
Category: Chick Flick/ Rom Com
SABRINA (1954) movie review
Audrey Hepburn wears the crown as golden age actress of class from her era. In every role, she carries herself with the ethereal grace of a princess. Even in her quintessential black leggings and flats, she remains the icon of fashion, elegance, and simplicity. 
In Sabrina, she plays the innocent chauffeur’s daughter in love with the son of the rich family for whom her father works. What begins as a rags to riches tale becomes more cat and mouse as the older brother seeks to dissuade the girls affections for the younger to maintain a business relationship. 
Playful and fun seeming on the outset, this story bridges more moral conundrums than seem common in a rom com, even one in black and white. You can always trust a Billy Wilder film to tell a simple seeming story with heart and complexity. Genius. Humphrey Bogart, of course, plays the much-too-old-for-her love interest who saves a young Sabrina from attempting to take her own life.
Such tragedies pursue the hopeless romantics cursed with unrequited love. We weep. We waiver. We wander. And she wanders all the way to Paris, to a cooking school, where an odd friendship helps her see her own value before she returns home as an independent woman. Or does she?
Will she allow her heart to swell as it once did for the fabulous playboy brother David, played by William Holden? Or will she fall for the one person in the world who listens as she speaks her mind and is surprisingly teachable, despite his foreboding manner. Bogart proves as lovable in Sabrina as in Casablanca, despite the less believable winter/spring fling potential.
He is charming and she is mature. He is lonely and she is in the way of his big business merger. He has to risk something, even his own heart. It becomes less a question of how than why ever not?
It’s a lovely princess story and a nice follow up to her treasured Roman Holiday performance. 
The 1995 remake with Harrison Ford, Julia Ormond, and Greg Kinnear proves equally as endearing, if justly a bit more aware of the darker tones and painstakingly fearful endeavor that those first steps into love truly are. Harrison and Humphrey, two charming loves who will always have my heart. 
Here is the original trailer: Sabrina (1954)
And Sabrina (1995)
LOVE, WEDDING, REPEAT (2020) movie review by Gwen Hughes
Love, Wedding, Repeat (2020) is a Netflix ensemble rom com set in beautiful Rome at the wedding of Haley and Roberto. Jack (Sam Claflin), the brother of the bride, is stunned to find out that both his ex and his dream girl, Dina (Olivia Munn), will be in attendance. The bigger issue for Haley is that her druggie ex-boyfriend shows up to the festivities to profess his love for her.
Naturally, she enlists big brother Jack to spike her druggie ex’s drink with some of her sleep medication. But Jack spikes the wrong glass and the “man of honor,” Brian, is dead weight on Haley’s big day.
We’re supposed to be rooting for Jack and Dina. And we do. Two gorgeous people with adorable banter who have obviously caught feelings for each other. Unfortunately, we don’t get to know them before the wedding. Without this foundation, it’s hard to root for them in the same way we root for, say, Harry and Sally.
The ensemble is filled out with a bumbling cast of characters including Sydney, a kilt-clad insurance worker with no social skills, and Chaz, the new boyfriend of Jack’s ex, who is intent on sparring with Jack the whole day.
The acting is great. Starring roles and bit parts are played by talented actors, many of whom are also professional comedians. Among the favorites are Irish comedian Aisling Bea and English writer and comedian Tim Key. Both have romantic side stories that get almost as much camera time as the starring couple.
The wedding is quite stressful; not even the bride can enjoy her big day. While the filmmaker was likely going for a “comedy of errors,” he missed the mark a bit, making the wedding an uncomfortable encounter for guests and Netflix audiences alike.
A “butterfly effect” theme, which has us relive parts of this chaotic wedding, provides some redemption, but you’ll have a hard time shaking off that first awkward iteration.
Good actors. Beautiful scenery. The bones of a funny wedding story. Love, Wedding, Repeat was aiming to be the next Notting Hill or Four Weddings, but, sadly, falls short of being a new classic.
(Now streaming on Netflix)
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Gwen Hughes is a seasoned writer and the Editor-in-Chief at Madison Park Living magazine. When she is not working, she enjoys reading short stories, quoting John Mulaney Netflix specials, and eating family-size boxes of Mott’s Fruit Snacks.
EMMA (2020) movie review by guest writer Annie Mae Platter
“Seriously! Can no one come up with a NEW story?!” I ranted at the petite blonde staring at me from the movie poster on the theater hallway wall.
I decided then and there that I would NOT succumb to the flashy allure of a retold tale. (Yes, I know that I was being prejudice.) This tea drinking, Jane Austen loving, anglophile would not spend over $12 to see yet another version.
Fast forward 3 months… Quarantine doldrums were knocking on my parent’s log cabin door where I live. We all needed some levity. Tight curls and a smug smile floated into my memory. I knew just what we needed.
I paid the $20 to rent, Autumn de Wilde’s Emma.
The opening scenes inviting me into Hartfiled (Filmed at Firle Place below) transported me to England. Pure delight. 
And Bill Nighy skipping down the stairs kicked all of my prejudice out the door. I was immediately won over. Nighy’s footmen made me giggle every time they came on screen, marching partitions around the room and searching for possible drafts. 
The film provided the much needed family levity. Wilde seemed to have had tea with George Bernard Shaw and Wes Anderson when she dreamed of creating this high-tea for the imagination. 
This 2020 adaptation of Emma was entirely new! The cast and crew made me feel as if I was a part an elaborate “stage” play, the stage being the English countryside.
The romantic element is presented with an all too real sense of humor which endeared the film to me even more.
And there she sits… Anya Taylor-Joy as “Emma” sipping tea and knowing that she was absolutely right all along. She knew I’d love her rendition of Emma.
P.s. If anyone can tell me what tea service is used at Hartfield… I’d much appreciate it.I spent over an hour researching and only narrowed it down to vintage Royal Albert (pictured below).
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Annie Mae Platter: A proper anglophile, literary nerd, and theologian. She recently admitted to 2 hobbies: vintage British pottery and turn of the century publishing companies. She funds her love for old books, travel, loose leaf tea, and pretentious coffee by managing international software engineers.
YESTERDAY (2019) movie review
REVIEW in HAIKU
Starving artist wakes
to a world with no Beatles.
It’s fame or girlfriend.
REVIEW in PROSE
In short: See this sweet British rom com that is unapologetically syrupy with a quirky premise that sways honest and endearing. If you like Beatles music at all, you’re sure to love it.
Director: after Slumdog Millionaire, Steve Jobs, and Trainspotting, Danny Boyle jumps into a pillow plush genre to prove that he can parade in the lighthearted RomCom as well as he can the darker
dramatic.
Writer: Richard Curtis – also wrote Notting Hill, About Time, Love Actually, Four Weddings and a Funeral, and Bridget Jones’s Diary. He’s prolific and perhaps THE quintessential British romcom writer.
Actors: Himesh Patel stars, showing off his prowess as both actor and musician. Lily James, too, plays the likable teacher, girl-next-door, pretty face who believes in him when he’s a clumsy nowhere man. Anglophiles will both get their fill and be delighted by Ed Sheeran’s lengthy screentime.
Basic premise: What if you, a talented and hopeful musician doing tiny shows at dive bars and county fairs woke up one day as the only person who has heard of the Beatles? You’d “write”and perform hit songs, make it big, struggle with the pressures of fame only to, like Dorothy, conclude that there’s no place like home.
Audience: A film for friends, families, and music fans alike. It’s a quick jaunt on tour in a sweet film that ebbs gradually through the playlist of favorites, tokening titles with memorable, laughable moments.
CRAZY RICH ASIANS (2018) movie review
It’s zippy fab Hallmark meets Vogue, like a 2 hour runway show without much plot beyond the recycled Cinderella story, add comedic pop fusion. 
Likable characters flit through wealthy Singapore parading food, fun, and fashion. It’s onscreen candy leading up to one of the most beautiful weddings ever witnessed. 
Very little backstory is needed to usher forth the lovers with mommy issues who must try to make it work despite socioeconomic divisions. 
I FEEL PRETTY (2018) movie review
From the overzealous caricature to the underdeveloped plot, this film seeks to validate the slightly overweight by suffocating them with overt Amy’s body-image messages. It plays like propaganda. Like the catchy but unfortunate “If you’re happy and you know it” tune that that one famous weight loss business reworded to say “If you’re lonely, eat your feelings, have a snack.” This too-long promo glazes over after the lingering pre-credits intro. Force-feeding an I’m-ok-you’re-okay-no-matter-what-we-look-like quickly turns to shaming as the hotter, mean girls tower in the hierarchy over less attractive smarter girls. This is the one way Amy balks the stereotype: her character is also not smart nor a good friend.
Amy Schumer’s poster girl attempt falls short because she is not ugly enough to pull it off. She’s lovely. It’s her insecurity that’s the turn-off. She makes a 13-going-on-30 Zoltar-Tom-Hanks’-Big wish in a femme fountain, hits her head and wakes up Feeling Pretty. Unlike Gwyneth’s fat suit film (Shallow Hal 2001), we don’t see that alter-Amy. She just shifts to her super confident self with the low low aspirations of front desking for beauty products mean moguls.
The bright spots are the co-stars when they get a word in – friends proposing group dates and the heart-of-gold tech nerd bf at Zumba.
It’s another Devil Wears Prada without the smart story, snappy writing, likable mentor, or plot arc. It’s just every screen Amy, all of Amy, too much of Amy. It’s gratuitous Amy.
In an era when Krasinskis are making smaller budget almost silent films with beauty and intrigue in every shot, movies like this feel so made-for-tv poor that holding the stub feels like an insult to art.
HOME AGAIN (2017) movie review
RomCom totality has been reached. Reese dawns mom jeans to prove that women her age can still get 20 year old boys.
This film’s all-heart-no-regrets message leaves watchers with warm fuzzy muddied morals when sort-of-separated Mom of two has a fling on her 40th to ward off the sorrow of feeling less than okay.
I am a big fan of birthdays, but this takes the goal a little too far.
The morning after, three sweet, sensational, LA dreamers move in.
No relationship, no background, just three super well-meaning 20 somethings who become instant uncles for the young girls of the house. 
Reality is not usually the basis for a rom-com. I get it. And I too, got caught up in the syrupy sentiment.
But I’m left pondering the truisms being presented in this film. I now recognize the fairytale farce for what it is and refuse to pass it all off as fine just because it’s a Reese-lovely rom com.
LOVE AND FRIENDSHIP (2016) movie review
Jane Austen’s unfinished novel hits screens with a thud. Tea cupboards swing wide with hospitality for the nearest of kin when they are widowed and destitute. Lady Susan, perfectly underplayed by Kate Beckinsale, overstays her welcome with two families.
She woos one husband into infidelity and a much younger man into a secret engagement. She is all coaxing and plotting with only her American friend as a confidant as they move from one drawing-room to the next taking tea in each space.
When her almost grown daughter enters the picture, a play for obedience turns to persuasion, and competition reigns. Who the winner is in the end is unknown as it screen cuts like the novel, without conclusion.
If you’ve read Austen, you’ll understand the quick cadence, the backward compliments, the heavy-handed jests and jabs at money and the heart. If you’ve seen any rendition of an Austen novel turned film, this one will both jolt and bore in comparison to her usual finality, idyllic beauty, and patient payoff.
BEFORE WE GO (2014) movie review
Perusing Netflix recently, I came upon a film that a friend suggested I watch. She knows that I dig a decent, sweet RomCom now and then. I had no idea at first click that I would be watching Chris Evans’s directorial debut. It turns out Captain America can act and direct; Evans stars in it, as does Alice Eve.
It may seem like a common, re-run romantic comedy on the outset, but the script is lovely, refreshingly honest, and well acted. I also found the film work unique and thoughtful. It helps that I love New York City. I enjoyed the detail and the color choices, and the ability to continue hearing a conversation while watching the outcome and next steps. We see Eve hang up the phone, dig through her purse for change, hail a cab, etc, all while listening to the end of her phone conversation. Brilliant use of movement and timing on Evans’s part.
It’s feels a bit like Before Sunrise (’95) in that it’s the journey of two strangers learning about one another and helping each other conquer their greatest hurdles in just one night in New York City.
It reminds us of the bravery it takes to have and build relationships with anyone, to be honest, to be kind. It shows the potential reward for small good deeds because we never know what one bravely kind good deed could lead to.
Splatter: on FILM 