The boy rides the crux
Of becoming his hero:
Outlaw or father
Crowe and Bale strike true
As likable outlaw and
underdog rancher
The old west’s ying yang
Justice rides the 3:10 train
Gunslingers roundup
Category: Western
SOLO (2018) movie review
Han’s the Robin Hood renegade rescuer in a dark side double-cross in this delightfully high speed, Star Wars-style action story staring the lovely Alden Ehrenreich. There’s only one problem, he’s not Solo.
No lack of star power, this film, rescued by all-star director Ron Howard plays like a sci-fi western Mission Impossible Bourne Identity Star Wars mash-up staring favorite faces from film and TV hits like Avengers, Hunger Games, Westworld, Atlanta (& Community), even Game of Thrones. 
Paul Bettany, Woody Harrelson, Thandie Newton, Donald Glover, and Emilia Clarke make Solo characters instantly recognizable and likable. The only distraction, which was also a major issue in Rogue One, is the Robot with too many lines bent on comic relief. Making her an advocate for Robot rights and a love interest for Lando still did not pay off or play as a necessary point in this Solo plot. Disney bankrolled this SW origin story hoping to draw millions of fans with these famous names.
What’s in a name? Well, Harrison Ford IS Han Solo. His brusque, carefree swagger fresh off a construction set and into the believable bad boy cockpit of the Millenium Falcon has been winning the hearts of OG Star Wars fans since ‘77. He’s the heart-of-gold smuggler who always claims to be in it for just that: the gold. He’s the Cool Hand on the run who shoots first, sass talks the evil Jabbas of the space underworld, and gets frozen in carbonite.
But now, the “I have a bad feeling about this” guy is all smiles and jeers, hope and helpfulness.
Sadly, this backstory romp escaping a tramp planet and into WWI conditions does not bring clarity to the Solo story despite run-ins with Glover’s suave Lando.
New Han is all good guy, sweet smiles, protecting the girl, saving the people. Here the cowboy wanders war-torn planets of mud and ice and sand as lovesick slave turns good guy smuggler. Classic and entertaining, just not Solo.
MAGNIFICENT 7 (2016) movie review
Seven against an army. Denzel Washington, leads a misfit gang of hired guns including Chris Pratt and Ethan Hawke to rush in and protect a town from the greasy, greedy bad man who threatens, steals from, and kills some of the poor, sweet, good-looking settlers. So when Denzel takes his “dually appointed Marshall” badge and secret revenge in to take out the tan trench-coated baddies with six-shooters, it’s High Noon meets Three Amigos.
Besides the group goal to go out guns blazing, the town prepares for war building giant spike gates and booby traps. Even so, without the Seven the town would have collapsed against the Gatling.
Despite the dry and often delayed line pacing, the scenes work and the dialogue doesn’t get old. It didn’t feel overly Pratted with his one-liners. It has its Good, Bad, & Ugly tribute stares and lovely cinematography, and the actors give the sense that they had a blast making the film.
Newish actress Haley Bennett made the film more believable by riding out in tears and fighting in tears. She didn’t play the triumphant heroine, or the oppressed female. She showed an honest side to gun-slinging and territory claiming. She bootstrapped and got to work letting the battle begin, come what may.
So much killing was to be expected, but if they’d decided to go beyond the pg-13 rating, it would have been a bloodbath. How do we care for one specific life on the screen when so many are expendable? Surplus cowboys didn’t make the number of deaths easier to palate.
Overall, it’s probably a 7 / 10. Fun and playful, but disturbing if you stop to consider body count, even in the Wild West.
HELL OR HIGH WATER (2016) movie review
A pair of brothers on the backward road to financial freedom, they are Texan Robin Hoods of sorts. County badge-toting partners in pursuit oddly parallel in partnerships unmatched by most film duos.
One brother (Ben Foster – genius in 3:10 to Yuma) is a regular outlaw, always running from trouble, always finding it. He knows he’s bad. He gives himself permission to lie and steal and gamble and cheat and run and kill and fight anyone he can. The other brother, (Chris Pine, showing here his true acting prowess) complex and tortured, fights but holds back, reluctantly moving forward with his plan. His plan. He’s the potentially pure, the wounded, the driven, yet it is his story.
The lead Marshall, played perfectly by Jeff Bridges, speaks his mind letting loose racial slurs and profanities, quick judgements and stereotypes. He is surprisingly savvy and astute as he tracks the boys committing the crimes. The partner patiently takes the brunt of the teasing. He is a Christian man, calm though disconcerted by endless jabs from his partner. He talks easily about retirement and afterlife since he knows where he is going.
These characters rarely say what they mean in dialogue. It’s brilliant writing that stirs and directs a plot without relying on forced verbiage to drive it. Humans rarely say what they truly mean, why should characters?
It’s Bridges’s character who parallels Pine’s. Both brooding, restless, uncertain, distant. They seek companionship, friendship, and love without resolve. Both have lost and feel they cannot earn it back. Both will pursue it to the end, come hell or high water.
THE LONE RANGER (2013) movie review
Solid ideas, explosive execution, but they forgot to choose an audience.
It’s too scary and gory for kids (the bad guy is also a cannibal …gruesome). 
But it’s too silly for most adults. (Johnny’s big repeated physical joke is feeding a dead crow that he wears on his head.) 
It’s classic Johnny Depp in every scene. He drops one-liners and quirky quips throughout. It felt like The Hatter got a facelift. Then it just exhausted with the second layer of Johnny as an old man telling the story. Overkill. Over overkill. Deathly overkill.
Armie Hammer was a great cast for the role. He pretties up the screen and makes the character likable. 
The Lone Ranger icon came into existence in comic books and on televisions in the 1940’s. Echoes from my grandfather prepared me to recall of the name of his friend “Tonto” and the Ranger’s call: “Hi-Ho Silver, away!” These were not, however, enough to endear the premise of this drawn out and violent film.
Visit Scarecrow Video!
Scarecrow Video, just off of Roosevelt & 50th in the U District in Seattle has EVERY title! Ask any one of the employees as you walk in for any new release, genre, director, obscure indie or international title and their degree in film studies will register beneath the lenses, and a pointer finger will raise to the exact location of that movie. Beware. When I say EVERY movie…I mean it. Many are not for young eyes…or mine. But go.
If you remember seeing The Hunt for Red October on an old gigantic lazer disc and you’ve ever wanted to relive that experience, you can rent players there. Even VHS players (what are those, right?), and projectors for that backyard film fest. Remember that one that you saw with your mom on Turner Classics when you were little that just haunts you? They’ve got it. What’s that one Wes Anderson movie? It’s there, and they know.
So, go! Visit Scarecrow Video and support a local legend. If you have out of town guests coming in, show them Seattle and take them to Scarecrow. Let them pick the movie or take them to the Italian film section and rent Life is Beautiful for a lovely and memorable evening. Say Hi to Kevin for me while you’re there. Shake his hand. He’s a good man.
I heart Scarecrow Video!
COWBOYS & ALIENS
Contrived.
The cake mix of cowboy movie must-haves: dirty, gun-toting scoundrels, swigging whiskey, court’n women. Then pour a spittoon-load of current blockbuster must have’s and mix! 
Make the one woman on set spout feminism while standing for her freedoms naked…because she owns her ill-clad body, doggonit! Have the expressionless hero earn points with the audience by literally petting a dog…er..uh..saving a cat.
Don’t forget the daddy issues, aliens with hard outer shells & useless slimy inner belly-hands, cool shooting wrist gadgets, throw backs to the holocaust (to ground it in real life), some one-take one-liners, and a mutual galaxy-wide lust for gold. 
If you don’t see this movie, watch the trailer. It’s like the movie, but the content is rich and satisfying.
AUSTRALIA (2008) movie review
On a sick day, one needs a movie movie to snuggle in to. 
Australia is just such a film. It was a 3 hour commitment in theaters. Call me crazy, but I’m a sucker for a good story. I cared about the characters. I wanted the best for each one. 
In this film, I’m transported, and I imagine myself in the midst of such dire entanglements. 
I carry aspects of this film in my pocket – the inner-connective Wizard of Oz story, the Aboriginal heritage, the journey, the war, the struggle. But mostly, I carry the vivid color and surging life of this film. It is a survival story. It is a love story. It is my favorite of Baz Luhrmann’s colorful collection, despite my utmost respect for his Romeo + Juliet, which I couldn’t teach English without. For you and for me, on our Meg Ryan-esque (You’ve Got Mail) sick days. Enjoy.
TRUE GRIT…2010
The Coen brothers take on a muscular script with ease in this classic western. Yes, a remake, but the Coens could never simply re-make, they must re-create! The acting rides as phenomenally over the gorgeous terrain as it does the haunting and trustworthy repeated hymn “Leaning on the Everlasting Arms.” There is a sensitivity to story that I respect, despite the ending. I’m glad that I’ve been well warned about the gore in Coen films, as they like to show the severed hand… In True Grit, however, their words (from a recent appearance on Charlie Rose) were something to the degree of, “Since our main character is a fourteen year old girl, we wanted fourteen year old girls to be able to – to want to see it.” So they tame it quite a bit. The characters are entirely loveable. Even old “Bear Claw” from Jeremiah Johnson seems to make a classy a cameo in his bear head hat. Almost as classy as Coen’s own cameo. (Watch for the man posted at the river). The film is very funny, but carries the heaviness of a raw burden for revenge. This mingles into tension throughout. Anne Shirley would say that the humor is “almost pace for the thud.”
“What have I to dread, what have i to fear, leaning on the everlasting arms. What a blessed peace, with my Lord so near, leaning on the everlasting arms.
Leaning, leaning, safe and secure from all alarms, Leaning, leaning, leaning on the everlasting arms.” – Hoffman & Showalter
Splatter: on FILM 